"I have an annoucement to make!"

Those were the words declared by my step-brother about 2 weeks ago. He is stationed in San Diego (Navy) and had brought his girlfriend with him to visit us for the week. We (step-mom, my dad, and I) were all in the kitchen making dinner when he felt it was time to make a big announcement. I was thinking maybe another promotion or he was transferring to another base, I don't think any of us were prepared for his next words.

"My wife is pregnant!"

Those were his exact words and the room fell silent for about two seconds and then his mother asked, "are you joking with me?"

This was when I went into smart ass mode and replied, "well that ring on his finger looks a lot like a wedding band to me!"

From there it went into congratulations and all the questions that follow that type of announcement. I'll sum the answers up for you:

"3 weeks ago"
"no one was invited"
"15 weeks along"
"we're really happy"
"Tyler Patrick if it's a boy and Alexandria Nicole if it's a girl"

Yes, they have all ready picked out names. I'm actually happy for him but I'm wondering if the Navy is slipping a bit. I thought sailors who had been to countries like Thailand had some sort of mandatory sex education class at some point. Must have slipped his mind or he was really drunk. He probably just slipped back into irresponsible mode as men are prone to do from time-to-time.

Of course, he has a very secure job with free health care as well as a car and a condo. He's doing much better than the rest of us. I guess what I have the biggest problem understanding is what she sees in him. Don't get me wrong, he's my favorite step-sibling and, although not the smartest bulb in high school, managed to work his way up from potato peeler to Master Helmsman of an aircraft carrier. He's just always seemed so socially immature that I figured it would be awhile before he got married. I'm not sure of the maturity exchange rate but she just turned 20 and he's 26, does that make them even?

Oh, one more interesting tidbit, her name is Esther which happens to be my mom's name. I bet my dad thought he'd never have to say that name again.

Lastly, for those looking for a gambling reference, I put the over/under at 4 years.

Until next time.....Just call me Auntie April (only if you want me to kill you instantly).