Thursday, February 01, 2007

My Last Day

It's my last day at the hospital and I am going to attempt to live blog it. What are they going to do, fire me?

5:51am - pulled into parking lot, 9 minutes early. That's 9 more minutes I could have slept.

5:55am - finally get out of car. See Miguel smoking in the parking garage. I've been here 5 years and that's the first time I've seen him smoke. Shows how much I pay attention to co-workers.

5:56am - punch in. I think this means I can leave 5 minutes early.

6:00am - turn pager on and officially open for business. Check box for morning EKG's and find it empty. Uh oh, this could be bad. It could be a sign of a busy day. Murphy's law, morning starts slow and by the end of the day you are pulling your hair out because of the craziness.

6:01am - pray to the gods that it is a quiet day!

6:10am - Go to ER to gather the EKG's that were done the night before. Damn, they were busy.

6:15am- back to department to catch up on paperwork. Check box, still no EKG's. Send up another silent prayer for a quiet day.

6:50am - paperwork is caught up. Now I wait for the coffee shop in the lobby to open. I've got 10 minutes. I think I'm going to live dangerously and go for caffeinated today!

7:17am - I have free coffee (with caffeine) and pastry. The day can officially begin.

7:56am - I just finished my first EKG of the day. Since we have all that patient confidentiality BS I can't talk about her but I don't think her husband is covered by that. The first thing I notice when I walk in the room is his San Francisco 49er jacket. I immediately offered my condolences, as I often do when meeting a 49er fan (Maura can attest to that). This led to a nice sports discussion and the revelation that he and his wife have been together for over 50 years. Hard to believe but there are still people out there who make it work. That is one thing I will miss, meeting couples who still obviously love each other after decades of marriage. Especially these two because if I were her, I would have dumped him the second I found out he was a 49er fan.

8:22am - Just got my first piece of cake for the day. Everyone here knows about my love of all things butter creme so I expect more before the day is out. This one is homemade with chocolate frosting made by Rock, the hottest male nurse in the hospital. His muscles alone make him hotter than McSteamy and McDreamy combined and damn, he makes a good cake.

9:06am - That's 2 EKG's for the day. I've mostly been visiting with co-workers and rubbing it in that this is my last day. I'm evil but it's so much fun! and seriously, today is all about me.....right?

10:28am - No I haven't been busy, just finished my third EKG. I've been visiting with people and making smart ass comments in an attempt to get fired so I can go home early. Basically my motto for the day is "What are they going to do, fire me?" Go right ahead and do it so I can go home and watch General Hospital.

1:15pm - Still not busy. I've done 7 EKG's. The hospital bought pizza for the entire hospital staff so I was hanging out with the Respiratory Therapists waiting for the pizza. Soon I will be eating a cupcake that has about 2 or 3 inches of butter creme frosting on it, my going away gift from my manager. She knows me so well.

1:50pm - Had a little rush there, I did 2 EKG's in a row. I'm starting to feel like I'm at work which isn't really what I had in mind for my last day. And where is my cupcake, dammit!

2:33pm - Crap! The doctor showed up to read the EKG's from the last 24 hours. I'm actually going to have to work. I have to type up his reports and make copies, do filing. And I still don't have my cupcake! I'm gonna need the sugar rush to make it through the rest of the day.

5:20pm/5:45pm - I still haven't been that busy but the stupid fracking computer went down so I couldn't update until now and I know you've all been waiting to find out if I finally got my cupcake. The answer is yes and it was very yummy. Really all I have left to do is a little filing then, at 6:30pm, I can get the hell out of Dodge. I'd really like to say "Fuck it" and leave the filing for my soon to be ex co-worker but she knows where I live so I shouldn't piss her off.

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